Sure, we all love those outdoorsy ads with the rugged guy hiking the backwoods with his trusty hound, the kids romping with their puppy on the beach, or the athletic gal jogging in the countryside with her canine companion. Everyone’s so free, so untethered. Of course, once the photo shoot ends and the trainers take those dogs back to the city, they go on LEASHES. Because that’s the law!
Nobody gives a shit how perfectly behaved you believe your dog to be. Nobody give a rat’s vag how cute or harmless you think your dog is. Leash laws aren’t interested in your personal opinion. And neither are the parents of the kid your off-leash dog just jumped on.
“Oh, sorry, he just really loves kids.” Well, let’s hope he also really loves a face full of mace.
And the owners working with their skittish rescue dog didn’t find it adorable when your off-leash dog lunged at theirs.
“Meh, don’t worry, he just wants to play.” He also, apparently, just wants his throat ripped out.
The guy with horrendous pet allergies wasn’t at all delighted when your off-leash dog rubbed its fur onto his pants.
“Gosh, sorry, she’s just saying hi!” She’s also getting a briefcase upside the head.
Other people don’t know if Poochie is looking to play or coming to bite…and they should NEVER have to wonder that because Poochie should be on a fucking leash. If you want to impress people with your leash-free dog prowess, take it hiking in the mountains or the wilderness. All kinds of creatures there just LOVE off-leash dogs…
Speaking of pet overindulgence...
Comments