Out of the Loop

Those stupid strap loop things inside women’s shirts and dresses…WHY?!  

"They help clothes stay on the hanger."

Oh, fuck off. No, they don't. And frankly, even if they did, nobody actually uses them. No one has the closet space to be hangin' up everything they own. Even the stores don't use them half the time. You've designed something to be stupid-looking and uncomfortable for the wearer so it can be perfect for...the hanger.

They’re ugly, always become visible at some point, and they feel like mouse tails on our shoulders. Jesus fuck, did a spider just crawl in my armpit?! Nope, just my stupid strap loop thing being its normal, pointless self.

And we’re all tired of cutting them out immediately after purchase especially since their now-pointy remnants avenge themselves by stabbing us repeatedly. Buttons pop off after two washes, but those stupid strap loop strings are sewn in with the tensile strength of fucking Kevlar thread.

These goddamned things were certainly not designed by the same people who would eventually have to wear them.

Granted, if I ever need a slingshot on short notice, you’ve got me covered. Otherwise, you and your stupid strap loop things can just fuck off.

For more ways to piss off customers...